From the very beginning of the piece, Susan Orlean creates a surreal, light vibe that is apparent throughout the entire story. Her very first words “If I were a bitch,” and soon after, in reference to Biff, “He almost never drools,” show that she clearly isn’t taking herself or her subject too seriously.  There is also a comparison made between Biff and President Clinton’s appearance. There is a general treatment of Biff as a subject as if he were a human being that serves to, in my opinion, highlight just how ridiculous the whole show dog scene is. Here is this dog that doesn’t have the capacity to understand why any of this is happening that is then paraded around for show as if he were a king or a supermodel (which, I guess, he is).  She also repeatedly uses the term “bitch” for a female dog, and although it is entirely correct, it serves to jar the reader every time it is used, seemingly to remind them that there is something slightly off about the whole situation.

Her decision to name off some of the other dogs that are appearing in the show served to even further highlight the ridiculousness of the dog show lifestyle. Instead of just mentioning that she flipped through the show’s catalog, she specifically named Spanktown Little Lu Lu (honestly, who started the tradition of ludicrous names like this?) and Energizer O’Motown. This served to keep the piece fun and entertaining without ever crossing the boundary into a mocking tone. Orlean did a fantastic job creating a fun and engaging piece out of a subject that few people truly care about.

“If I were a bitch, I’d be in love with Biff Truesdale. Biff is perfect. He’s friendly. good-looking. rich, famous, and in excellent physical condition. He almost never drools. He’s not afraid of commitment. He wants children-actually, he already has children and wants a lot more. He works hard and is a consummate professional. but he also knows how to have fun.”

Susan Orleans grabs the attention of the reader by seeming perverse, but really plays around with canine terminology in this piece. “Bitch” being used to describe a female dog, she lures the eyes to continue reading to figure out whom this man is that she is willing to be a bitch for.  Her writing style is simple, easy to follow, and colorful. She brings the character to life by personifying his emotions, even comparing him to Bill Clinton. Biff is a professional and he understands his abilities. He fluidly follows his celebrity caliber schedule and exemplifies traits of an actual human being. Even with the description of his most subtle actions like rolling his eyes, or sighing out of contempt.

The roles of the human and canine seem reversed in this story as the reporter takes on the role of the idle bystander, the usual role of a pet. She uses phrases like ” as I pawed through the files” to accomplish this. Her thorough use of canine terms tie this piece together and always remind the reader that this dog “with an attitude” is in fact a glorified pet and not the suave (human) gentlemen that we imagine him as.

I think her use of syntax and the flow of this story is what I plan on taking to use in my article. It’s about not doing too much and using sentence structure that captures the same essence as the character. Orleans’ tone was witty yet simple. Her descriptions of Biff’s owners, handlers, and their interactions with the dog were well executed because they were not polluted with complicated sentences. The piece therefore read itself. When writing a profile piece, the writer should not try to impress the reader with fancy vernacular, but be the clearest you can be to properly capture the subject.